WHEREAS, The Washington State Senate is VERY confident the Seattle
Seahawks will defeat the Denver Broncos on Sunday; and
WHEREAS, With all due respect to the fine people of the State of
Colorado, the 12th Man numbered 30,000 strong just to see their team
off to the Super Bowl, while Colorado managed 300 or so to see their
Broncos off; and
WHEREAS, The Seattle Seahawks gave their fans much to be proud of,
indeed, inspiring them to not just set the world record for stadium
noise once, but TWICE in one season; and
WHEREAS, The 12th Man has been known to trigger seismic events
(that would be earthquakes for you middle of the country folk), for
real; and
WHEREAS, Colorado makes some fine craft beverages, but really? Do
you want to start that fight with the state that invented the genre?
Between fine coffee, brewers, and wineries, Seattle is the beverage
capital of the United States, if not the world; and
WHEREAS, We wholeheartedly agree and hope that your admittedly
incredible quarterback does resemble Mount Elbert: A little rocky and
immobile; and
WHEREAS, Your 14ers are really nice, but c'mon, have you seen Mount
Rainier? Cloaked in glaciers and rising nearly 2.5 miles above its
surroundings, it is more singular, more monumental, and more
intimidating than any of Colorado's 14ers, much like the Seahawks over
the Broncos; and
WHEREAS, The Great State of Colorado has named 53 individual 14ers
after 53 individual players, because the Broncos are a band of
individuals, however the State of Washington resolves to name one
magnificent mountain after the Seahawks because they are and act as a
TEAM;
NOW, THEREFORE, BE IT RESOLVED, That the Washington State Senate
does hereby rename Mount Rainier as "Mount Seattle Seahawks" from this
point until 12:00 a.m. Monday, February 3, 2014; and
BE IT FURTHER RESOLVED, That the Washington State Legislature
respectfully request of the United States Department of the Interior
that Mount Rainier's namesake National Park (yeah, our Mountain is that
cool, it warrants its own National Park) be retitled "12th Man National
Park" for the same time period; and
BE IT FURTHER RESOLVED, That Sunday, February 2nd be proclaimed
SEAHAWK SUNDAY in the great State of Washington.